cancer sucks

Ifyou think that you read a long rambling incoherent post here, you were imagining it. Good advice- do not write on a blog after drinking wine. And for that matter, don't drink wine to deal with bad news. (I will try whiskey next time.) Because really the next day you still have to deal with shit, and you are a little hungover. My excuse was that when i called for the results of my lymph node biopsy,which everyone knew would be negative, I learned that in fact it was NOT FUCKING NEGATIVE. All that chemo and still they found cancer in six of my lymph nodes. The good news is that those particular lymph nodes are sitting in a lab at Mass General, not in me. But still.... Now I have some thinking to do. The first two things I did: 1. Get drunk, and 2. Texted a friend to go sky diving. If my life is going to be interupted all the time by stupid cancer stuff at least I am going to have fun and do all the things I have wanted to do for a while and never gotten around to. I am still sure that I will die of old age, not cancer, but this whole thing seems to be taking a lot longer than it was supposed to, so I am going to stop putting things off until I am done with cancer and just live in the moment. Or hopefully a later moment when I am not so hungover. Caroline, you are a sweetheart. Thank you so much for commenting on my drunken post just as if it were normal.