Monday, July 12, 2010
too stupid for cancer
ok, i am a nurse. Granted, a psychiatric nurse for the past almost 25 years, so I know more about psychiatric stuff and have in fact easily diagnosed myself, friends and family and strangers in elevators with various psychiatric aliments, generally correctly. But I know some medical stuff. I work in Hospitals, for god's sake. Psych patients have medical issues, too. So i am assuming I should know more medical stuff than a non-medical person. makes sense, right? Then why, every time faced by my oncologist, I get nothing right? Why did i, for a week, think that I had more cancer and that chemo did not work? There is some kind of cancer talk that I just don't get. So Apparently this lymph node thing is no big deal- then I asked him if i am now a different stage? he says no, you are still a stage 3. Really? I thought I was a stage one, then someone who paid more attention said no, you thought you were a stage one but were really a stage two (a kid or a friend or someone said that, so apparently I told them that.) But stage three? News to me, although I guess not news to my oncologist. So, ok, I admit it. I am too stupid to have cancer. I am ready to get rid of it now, and give it to someone who is smarter than me. Really they should only let really smart people, preferably male oncologists, get cancer. Because I think they are the only ones who know what they are talking about. I am now seriously considering buying breast cancer for dummies, so I will have something to read while I await the arrival of the book that is not going to let me eat ice cream. And yes, I do think the medical system should be run by nurses. Doctors focus on the disease, nurses focus on the patient with the disease. Luckily I have a lot of friends who are nurses. And kids who pay attention to what doctors and other people, even me, say. So tomorrow i see the radiation doctor. Hopefully, he- and yes, it is a he, the female radiation oncologist is in Boston and I cannot drive to Boston 5 days a week for a month or however long it is going to be. Hopefully, he will speak a language I understand, or someone will have to come with me as a translator. Or maybe he will have everything done by a nurse. I can only hope.